Perfection

Perfection seems to be what women strive to be; but we tend to demonize anything outside of that word.

Women are expected to not be too fat because it’s unhealthy and unattractive, but not be too thin because otherwise we’re “anorexic” and unlovable.

 We are expected to wear makeup to match the ever-changing beauty standards, but not too much because it doesn’t look natural.

We are expected to be quiet, but not too quiet otherwise you can get abused, but if you’re too loud you will be regarded as opinionated, someone who doesn’t know her place.

We are expected to raise children, to clean, and to cook delicious and healthy food to be considered good mothers; but at the same time, we have to work too and contribute to the household income, otherwise, we’re a burden to the family, we’re gold diggers, we spend too much of our husbands’ money. And even then, if we focus on work too much, we’re neglectful mothers, someone who doesn’t have enough time for her children.

We are expected to be strong, but not too strong. We have to learn to rely on men, otherwise, we’ll grow up lonely and unlovable with wine and cats. But if we rely on them too much, we’re too weak, too fragile, too delicate.

Even when something happens, somehow we are to blame, even on things that are outside of our control.

If we wear clothes too short, we are asking for it, we are assaulted, we are sluts, whores, and strippers. If our clothes are too long, we are prude, too modest, someone who doesn’t know how to have fun. But no matter what we do, we are still assaulted, raped, molested, and even killed. Yet somehow it is still our fault.

“What were you wearing?”

“You went out drinking, what did you expect?”

“You shouldn’t have gone with those people.”

Everyday, we strive to be perfect, to be left alone. Yet, everyday, we are harassed, assaulted. And everyday, it’s our fault… Always our fault.

No matter what we do…

Perfection is what we strive to become.

But even that is not enough to keep us safe.

~ KMC